Really?

I am embarking on some new territory lately and find myself constantly thinking...really? Is this really my life? Was this really the plan? I find some things exciting yet terrifying at the same time. It's exciting to think of going back to work and yet terrifying at the same time. I am scared to leave my little kaytlee. I cherish every moment I have had home with her. She is an angel that has done wonders for my soul. I worry about what job I will find and how it will handle school activities for my darling Kynlee. I have been so blessed to be able to attend all of her school functions and take her everywhere she needs to go.
Really? Ugh.
But I am really blessed to have family here that will fill in the gaps whatever job I take uncovers. My mom is always up for keeping the little ladies or driving them to and from. Scott's parents are here and able to help as well as Scott's sister whom my girls love. So I am blessed. What if I lived far away from family with no help and no extra hands?
Really? Yes.
I am making changes and they are scary and the unknowns can almost make me crazy if I let them. I have to just take this one day at a time remembering its out of my control and that God will place me exactly where I need to be.
Really? This is hard.
Really? I need to believe.